The 8 Craziest Job Openings in the Military-Industrial Complex

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Top-secret janitor. Pollster to the spies. Classified comic book artist. Any organization sufficiently large is bound to have the odd job opening within it. But few organizations are as freakin' colossal as the U.S. military intelligence industrial complex, with an estimated 4.9 million Americans holding security clearances today. Which means there are thousands of unconventional positions to fill at any given moment.

Here are some of the wilder military and intelligence "help wanted" ads we found online. Some classifieds are for truly wacky jobs. Others are for slightly more standard positions -- but presented in an odd way. If you find more, let us know in the comments, on Twitter or on Facebook. We'll post some of the best suggestions.

Above:

Military-Industrial Artist

Let's face it, your artistic talent is going to waste working for minimum wage at that coffee bar. And you're not exactly using your top-secret security clearance either, brewing up mochaccinos. Luckily, there's a job that combines your comic book skills with your remarkable ability to make it through art school while only barely hitting the bong. Virginia-based Pentagon contractor TASC is looking for a graphic artist to join their "Global Systems Business Unit." There you'll design "creative artwork" that can "communicate mood, emphasis, insight, viewpoint, and similar visual impressions" through brochures, emblems, and posters. That's like band and gig posters, right? Sure, if you think of "gig" in terms of engineering support for the Pentagon's fleet of spy satellites. (You'll also have to clear a polygraph test.) And not to worry. While the corporate culture of the military-defense industry can be a little square, TASC wants to use satellite data to "move from reporting historical location information to predicting events," company vice president Robert Horback told Geospatial Intelligence Forum. Hipster credibility is based on knowing what's cool in advance of everyone else, so it's a perfect job, really.

Photo: Newton Free Library/Flickr